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Dear Ms. Cards Etiquette, My friend from college has a very serious illness. I’d like to send her a get well card, but it seems inappropriate since she may not actually recover from this debilitating disease. I live in Alaska and she lives in Kansas, so visiting her is difficult, and frankly may not happen before the end of her life. While we are not as close as were in college, we still talk a couple times a year. I’d like to send something, but I’m not sure what to send or what to say on the note when I do send it. Please HELP! Befuddled in Barrow, Alaska For temporary illnesses and injuries, there’s the ubiquitous Get Well card. For deaths in the family, there’s the Sympathy card. For everything else, including your friend’s unfortunate situation, Befuddled, there’s the Thinking of You card. It’s a flawless stopgap option for any situation where you simply don’t know what to say … serious or terminal illnesses, divorce, anything in the “I’m so sorry, and there’s nothing I can do to fix it” category, really. But sometimes, even the most well-meaning greeting cards really do fall short of the situation at hand. In your case, Befuddled, I’d make an effort to visit your friend as soon as possible, or at the very least, give her a call on the phone. Kansas is indeed a long way from Alaska, but you may be able to find a discount last-minute fare if you look online and/or call the airlines. In a small community like Barrow, you may even find a private pilot who’d be willing to fly you to the nearest major airport at a discount or for free … it’s certainly worth asking around! As for what to say on your card, I’m lacking my usual “3 step plan” for this one. Say how sorry you are to hear the news, mention that you are trying to arrange a visit and ask if/when she’s most able to have a guest (because you are trying to arrange a visit, aren’t you?), and let her know if she ever needs someone to talk to, you’ll be happy to hear from her. You might wish to enclose a picture of the two of you in happier times. I don’t know that there’s much else you can do, Befuddled. Best of luck to both you and your friend! Tags: get well cards, Greeting Card Etiquette, Thinking-of-you-card In the most recent issue of In Touch Weekly dated Oct 8, 2007, it is reported that Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise still have not sent out Thank You cards for their wedding that happened last year on November 18. Apparently, even the stars find writing Thank You cards a chore. Ms Cards Etiquette does find it amusing, however, that all the gossip magazines are blaming poor Katie for this faux pas, when in fact, both parties in a wedding should be responsible. This is the 21′st century after all, not 1955. Lucky for the Cruises that it is never too late to write a thank you card. And, since they are reported to have had more than 150 guests at their lavish Scientology ceremony, they are also lucky that you don’t have to write more than a few lines on a Thank You card to get the point across. Since they have waited so long, they may wish to write an extra line or two explaining why their thank yous are tardy. If, however, they are too busy for that, just a simple “Thank you for the wonderful gift, we get a lot of use out of it.” is still appropriate. I’ve written a few tutorials on Thank You cards that can be found here just in case Tom or Katie need some assistance on writing their Thank you notes: Salvation for Late Thank You Cards 3 Steps to Perfect Thank You Notes Thank You Notes from CardsDirect Tags: Greeting Card Etiquette, Thank You Cards, Thank-you-notes Dear Ms. Cards Etiquette, I’m trying to expand my business, and have been considering starting a greeting card mailing list for the company. Do you think it’s worth the effort for a small (one-person) company, and do you have any advice for a first time greeting card mailing? Ambitious in Arizona You’re a businessman after my own heart, Ambitious! Of course I think greeting card campaigns are a fantastic way of marketing your business, whether you’re a one-person office or a large company. Keep in mind that a greeting card campaign can be done badly, to the point of actually driving business away. However, it is so easy to do them well, I don’t see how so many businesses manage to screw them up. For beginners (or those trying to run damage control on Clueless Inc.’s card campaign), here’s Ms. Cards Etiquette’s 5 basic guidelines to a good greeting card mailing program:
There you go Ambitious, not so difficult after all, is it? Now, go out there and do me proud. One less company committing grievous greeting card faux pas can only be a good thing. Need greeting cards to get started? Tags: business-how-to, Greeting Card Etiquette, Greeting-card-campaign Dear Ms. Cards Etiquette, There’s an older woman who lives in my building who I often visit with. Her family all lives far away, and her birthday is coming up soon. I’d like to do something for her, but I’m at a loss for ideas. Help, please! Neighborly in New York First off Neighborly, I only wish there were more people like you in this world. Seriously. As a general rule, I’d say we could do with less people, but not at the expense of losing the few folks like you out there. Secondly, almost anything you might do for your neighbor would probably be appreciated. (Plenty of people would be relieved to find themselves in such a low-pressure gift giving situation!) That said, you asked for help and that’s what I’m here for … so here’s three easy ideas for how to brighten up your friend’s birthday:
Tags: Birthday Cards, Birthday-Ideas, Greeting Card Etiquette, Happy-Birthday-Cards Dear Ms. Cards Etiquette A colleague is in the hospital for surgery, and I’d like to give her a Get Well card, but I’m not sure what to say on it. Can you give me some suggestions? Anxious in Arizona Well Anxious, I’m sure your colleague will appreciate your thoughtfulness in getting her a card at all, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself! The first question is whether or not this is an individual or group/office card. If multiple people are going to be signing it, there’s no need to worry about writing a long note yourself. A simple sentence like, “I’m looking forward to seeing you back in the office,” or a phrase like, “Wishing you a fast recovery,” is sufficient. Everyone will add their own note, so you don’t want to take up more than your share of the room on the card! If you’re really phobic of making a Get Well faux pas, this would be the route to take. If you’re wanting to send your colleague a more personal, one-on-one card, you’ll want to write a bit more, but there’s still no need to pen the great American novel on the card. If you know the recipient well enough (and you know they’ll appreciate it!), a little humor is sometimes just the thing to brighten someone’s day in the hospital. However, if your colleague is the serious sort or you’re not very close, it’s safer to stick with more formal sentiments. Here are a couple of example notes to use as a guideline: For a colleague with a distinctive personality:
For a colleague with a desk plant or aquarium:
Balloons, bouquets and stuffed animals are popular small gift items to include with get well cards, so if you think your colleague would appreciate something like that, feel free to pick something up to attach your card to as well! Although I know it might seem awkward to deal with a colleague’s illness or medical procedure, writing get well cards really isn’t as scary as it seems. I’m sure you’ll do just fine, Anxious! Tags: get well cards, Greeting Card Etiquette, greeting-card-writing Well, dear readers. Just when I finally got myself all settled in here, CardsDirect is trying to make Ms. Cards Etiquette obsolete! I urge you all to write in letters of protest if you prefer your advice with a personal touch, rather than an impersonal, automated, internet-robot touch. Etiquette fans unite! You have nothing to lose but your faux pas! Actually, in all seriousness, they have brought out a really neat new feature on the website here, and I’m pretty sure it’s not threatening my job security, so never fear… For all of you considerate souls out there who want to make sure you write the correct thing on all your greeting cards, CardsDirect now offers “suggested wordings” for their most popular greeting card categories! Not only will this help you last-minute types pen the perfect note without waiting for your’s truly to provide you with guidance, but it will leave me free to concentrate on more unusual and ‘sticky’ (read: more entertaining for you!) queries in the blog here. It’s a win-win situation if I ever heard one! Tags: CardsDirect, christmas-card-writing, custom-verse, Greeting Card Etiquette, Greeting Cards, greeting-card-writing, Holiday Card Etiquette, Holiday Cards, holiday-card-writing Dear Ms. Cards Etiquette, I had a batch of thank you cards written up, and ready to go, and supposedly mailed a month ago, and I just found out the person who was supposed to mail them actually misplaced the whole batch instead! I’m embarrassed to send them all out so late, but I don’t want to write a whole new batch just so I can add a line apologizing for the delay. What should I do? Up the Creek without a Thank You Goodness, that is an unfortunate situation, Creek. Congratulations, you even made Ms. Cards Etiquette cringe! But there is still hope, even if you’re too lazy to rewrite an entire batch of cards. (Just kidding, I’d be too lazy to re-do them all as well!) If you need new thank you cards CardsDirect has plenty of varieties from which to choose. Firstly, I always say it’s better late than never for thank you cards. So, by all means, you should still mail them out. But I also always say you should make some apology for tardiness if it is an issue, so you’re not taken for an oblivious buffoon, so that’s where we must get creative in this case. How I would deal with it depends on one key question: Will the recipients appreciate a humorous approach to the situation? If so, here’s an idea that will acknowledge the mishap with a smile: Write a quick humorous note on the back of each envelope, such as “Finally rescued from the Australian outback!” or “We fired the mail monkey when we found a bag of cards hidden in the broom closet,” or maybe, “If you noticed this card was late, you passed the test! Congratulations! Report to HQ for your secret assignment.” You get the idea … something that will make the recipients chuckle, but also let them know you realize you made a boo-boo. If you have the poor luck to have humorless recipients, or the situation is just too formal for such shenanigans, you have my condolences. In that case, you might want to put the old cards into new envelopes (assuming they haven’t already been stamped, one hopes), and enclose a very brief note apologizing for the delay. Basically write the same apology you’d include in a re-written card, but write it on a separate note. Then stamp the new envelopes yourself, if that’s what you need to do to ensure they get to the mailman this time, and hope nobody on your list is overly uptight about promptness. All in all, it’s not a hopeless disaster, so long as you handle it with good grace and good cheer. It’s amazing how far a positive attitude can take you in an awkward situation! Good luck and Godspeed, Creek. Now start paddling! Tags: Greeting Card Etiquette, Thank You Cards, Thank-you-notes Alrighty, everyone! If you’ve been tormenting yourself over whether or not to send that late Thank You card, or you got a great lead from a business associate and you just never got around to saying thanks, or … whatever your dilemma, you’ve just been granted clemency! September 24th is National Thank You Day! Promoted by the Emily Post Institute, National Thank You Day is a perfect opportunity to spread a little good will (and relieve your conscience of the weight of all those belated thank yous you’ve been meaning to send). Not sure what to do for National Thank You Day? Here’s 10 things you can do to express your thanks to the people in your life you don’t always think of … they’ll appreciate it (and you’ll be able to remove yourself from the 90.2% of Americans who feel they don’t say thank you often enough):
CardsDirect has a great selection of Thank You cards to help you celebrate National Thank You Day in style. Available in convenient 100-count boxes, you’ll have more than enough beautiful Thank You cards to go around, even for National Thank You day! Tags: Greeting Card Etiquette, National-Thank-you-card-day, Thank You Cards, Thank-you-notes Do I need to send an anniversary card to my mother-in-law, even though her - Squeamish in Seattle Well, it may seem a bit morbid, Squeamish, but if your MIL really does If you’re uncomfortable sending her a “happy anniversary” card, you could Tags: Greeting Card Etiquette, sympathy-card, think-of-you-card I am fairly close to a business associate who is a client of my business. I’d like to send him a birthday card, but I’m not sure if I should send it to his office or his home? - Birthday Blues in Boston No need to be blue, Blues, this is one of the simpler etiquette questions you could be stuck with! An easy rule of thumb is to always send business associates’ cards to their offices unless one or more of the following conditions applies: 1. You’ve met the associate’s spouse at a social function, such as a holiday party or barbecue. (Even then, if you were only introduced in passing, sending to the office might still be best.) Now, if you’re going to send the card to their home, do make sure to address it appropriately! For a birthday, it’s naturally acceptable to address the card solely to the birthday boy, but assuming you’ll also be adding this person to your regular holiday card list, keep the following in mind: Don’t send a holiday card addressed to Bob Smith if there’s also a Mrs. Smith at home. It should either be Mr. & Mrs. Bob Smith, or Bob Smith and Mary Walsh (last names in alphabetical order) if the couple doesn’t share a last name. And don’t forget to add “and Family” if the couple has children. Sending cards to someone’s home is a bit more involved than sending it to their office, but everyone enjoys receiving mail that isn’t a bill, so just remember you’re spreading a little cheer while you’re sorting out all those salutations! Just make sure you choose the right birthday card! Tags: Birthday Cards, Greeting Card Etiquette |
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